I homeschooled my three children through high school and they have all done well. One is in grad school for physics, another is working full time with an AA degree, and the third has his BS in mathematics and is working on applying to grad school for that. They are healthy, happy, and well-adjusted too. Half of my friends homeschooled their children and most are doing fine. Not all are – but not all of my friends’ public school kids are doing great either. Such is life.
Walking away will work every time. The narc script says that the narc controls you, and if you walk away it shows he or she does not- cue shock. What does not work- “standing up” to a narc, by which I mean calling the narc on his behaviour , objecting, making a fuss. That is attention- negative attention, but any attention will do for the narc, and you have just shown the narc how to upset you- so he will do it over and over. Narcs don’t change, or improve, or ever start to treat you better. Getting away is the only thing that works.
I know that is difficult- it means giving up on your dream of a relationship with this narc, and at the beginning it was all so perfect. But that is all it was, a dream, and the narc simply conned you into loving him. He never loved you back, and never will, so escape is , sadly, your only option. And that will shock him to his core. It will not change him, not one iota- he will treat his next supply exactly as he treats you. But you will be gone, and happy, and will not care. There is no shock treatment that will work to improve your narc, unfortunately.
Please learn about the disorder so you can see why I say this, and why your escape is the only option if you want a happy life. Since every narc is the same, one book will do it. I always recommend Prepare to be Tortured (the price you will pay for dating a narcissist) . AB Jamieson, on Amazon. It is a good general guide and will tell you all you need to know, and it covers narcs as friends and colleagues and relatives, which is useful – there are a lot about. It is also good on the red flags, so you can spot narcs in future and stay well away.
I live in a rural area, so when I say my neighbor, it’s not like he’s right next door. This person lives around 300 feet away, with woods in between us. One day we were walking by, and he was outside, talking on the phone to someone with whom he was obviously very upset. He was talking quite loudly, and he said, “Don’t think I won’t do it. I’ve killed before and I will kill again.” I thought he was just blowing steam, but then the neighbor on the other side of him, who had also heard him, decided to Google him, and sure enough, the man had been in prison for several years for murder. The neighbor who found out said to me, “Maybe I should’ve done some deeper research before I moved here.”
As for “do you think it should be free”, that’s rather puzzling to me. Free to whom? My homeschooling my kids was definitely free to the state, and then some: we paid property taxes which support public schools, but we didn’t use the public schools. So in this case, the state has 3 educated people that they did not have to pay to educate. Educating my children was certainly not free to me. I paid for materials, I paid for co-op classes. Are you thinking that somehow the state should pay for me to homeschool my kids?